My tawdry love affair with the Kobo eReader

It’s official. I am in love with the Kobo eReader. I never thought it would happen. I’ve always said I love real books. I love the feel; I love the smell; I love the pretty covers; I love browsing the library to pick them up. But I now have a new love and it’s a little magical tablet that holds all my favorite books in a pretty little case that I can read anywhere.

The funny thing is I don’t even have one of my own. My mom lent me hers and I can’t get enough of it. It’s so easy to read it anywhere! While you walk, at the gym, lying in bed. I don’t get dizzy or lose my place or have my fingers cramp up. And I don’t even feel like I’m looking at a screen. It’s madness! If you have yet to experience its glory – you simply must – whether you have to beg, borrow or steal!

The Book of (Holiday) Awesome: Real Bearded Santas

Well, Christmas day may be over officially – but the joy lives on! For one: because my immediate family has Christmas with our extended family today so the x-mas cookies and holiday spread will be making a comeback. But also because my sister gave me The Book of (Holiday) Awesome. So even when Christmas may seem like it’s a million days away, I can flip to a page and smile over the thought of Real Bearded Santas. Cause let’s face it, who doesn’t love it when they walk through a mall and see a jolly old man who actually looks like the real deal? Some other highlights:

Just barely wrapping a gift with that tiny scrap of leftover paper. (A joy that can come at any time of the year even.)

Staying up so late that everything becomes funny. (Exhibit A: My sisters and I spent until midnight last night faux-bickering over who would get each item of my still-very-with-it mother’s jewelry box. Sounds morbid but I guarantee three girls decked out in rings that don’t fit and jewels the size of a big toe is purely comical.)

And, finally…

Eating anything with oil in it. (Although I would alter this to Eating Everything. Period. Because when else can you realistically justify to yourself that, yes, you do need that ninth Christmas cookie?)

So, Christmas lives on! And I highly suggest you get yourself a copy of The Book of (Holiday) Awesome because it is just too excellent to pass up.

Jumping into a fresh lake

There’s nothing quite like jumping into a fresh lake on a hot summer day. It’s refreshing, relaxing and soothing all at the same time. You can’t help but feel like a kid again. Even if you live in the city I strongly recommend finding your way to a nearby lake. Sometimes the easiest way to do this is just to google a map of your home address and then slowly zoom out until you find a body of water nearby. Then see if that particular lake has a public beach available. Often there will be one just a half hour drive out of the city. Make a day of it with your friends and family. Take a picnic, bring some outdoor games and get ready to splash around in the lake – there’s nothing better!

Entertaining Gym People

Having trouble getting yourself to go work out? I have a game for you to make a trip to the gym more entertaining. Did you ever go to the states when you were little and play the game where you have to count how many license plates you see from different states? The point is to try and make note of one from each state. Well this game works like that except you’re trying to spot as many of the following gym characters as possible.

1. The Starer.  Now, normally I notice a guy who stares because they have creepily locked their gaze on myself or one of my friends (or the girl with the big tatas that happens to have passed by).  But the gym starer is of a different breed because he far prefers to stare at himself. But he doesn’t just gaze at his reflection in order to make sure he’s doing a move correctly. He stares at his muscles when he enters a room, when he exits, even when he moves between machines. Sometimes he will even go in the opposite direction of where he needs to go next so that he can find himself in front of a mirror and contemplate his guns. Give yourself a bonus point if you catch him taking a break from working out to actually stare into the mirror as he flexes. And triple the bonus point if while he flexes he attempts to poke or pinch his flexed arm.
2. The Semi-Nudist Pageant Queen. This particular character stands out because she looks more like she belongs in the bikini portion of a beauty competition than at the gym. Hair is often voluminous and shows signs of having sat in curlers for over an hour. Face is covered completely in perfectly executed makeup – and said makeup always remains perfectly in place because no sweating occurs. This lack of sweat is accomplished because the semi-nudist pageant queen never actually does any working out at the gym. She may walk at an easy pace on the treadmill but quickly moves on to a variety of bum toning machines. This is all done very easily so as to not upset her perfect coif. The final way in which to spot #2 on the list is the very minimal clothing she typically sports. Booty short and a sports bra are her ideal selections. The average gym-goer might shy away from wearing so little for practical reasons but as the semi-nudist pageant queen is never actually doing anything at the gym that might result in a nip-slip or severe camel-toe, she chooses to put every last inch of her on display. She is also likely to try desperately to catch the attention of The Starer, but sadly he cannot tear his eyes away from himself.
3. The Sweater. Now, let me begin by saying that I fully support working hard at the gym and therefore sweating cannot be avoided. However, what I do not enjoy as much is being able to trace exactly where The Sweater had been because he leaves a trail wherever he goes. Though he may be offered towel service and sanitizer bottles are in clear abundance, he prefers to forgo these possibilities in favour of leaving as much sweat as possible in his wake. Bikes, weights, mats – are all left with a healthy coat of sweat. What a treat!

Bonus tip: To keep yourself motivated you can vow to stay at the gym until you come across someone from every category. Trust me – if you’re at a gym like mine it isn’t hard.